Friday, 18 June 2010

This Post Could Use A Photo But I'm Too Lazy To Find One




Life is football (soccer for you Americans) nowadays. Three games a day. That’s not much. There are still plenty of hours in a day.
To sleep.

They say summer is here. I can see the green grass, violet lupines, and golden don’t-know-whats. It’s not snowing.
Good.
I do hate snow. You do remember it.

The spring came over nigth, stayed for a day and then there was summer. I sat inside, pain in my back, unable to walk. Heard how people marvelled the sudden summer.
I couldn’t care less. I just wanted to kill somebody.
My pain, for example.

Depression gave space to pain. Please, do come in, depression said. We have plenty of room in this vast emptiness of this creature which she calls her body and soul.
Together they had fun.

To kill the pain I went to the hospital and had an operation. I tried to tell the surgeon also to cut off my depression, but he thought I was hallucinating.
I was dead serious.

Now the hurt and ache are gone. Violet lupines start to dry away. My depression needs no watering. It’s a surviver, a fighter.

And summer. It rolls along like the football on green grasses way down south.



13 comments:

lepis said...

I'm clad you didn't kill the doctor!

SusuPetal said...

Kill your darlings, they tell writers to do, Lepis. Maybe it happens only in fiction.

jinksy said...

I'm so sorry you seem to have been going through the wars! Have a gentle, healing hug from me to brighten your day for a moment or two, at least! :)

SusuPetal said...

Thanks for the hug, Jinksy. Nerve aches are gone, that is good at least.

SuviAnniina said...

Päivä kerrallaan, muista että lupiinitkin vain näyttävät kuolleilta ja kuihtuneilta,mutta maan alla niillä on juuret,
vahvat juuret!

jl said...

I think it's sad that the most creative persons usually are the ones with most pain and depression. And you can take that as a compliment. But anyway I'd spare you from all misery if I could.

SusuPetal said...

SuviAnniina, jossain syvällä uskon tuohon mitä sanot. En kai muuten olisi tässä :)

jl, thanks for your kind words.

chrome3d said...

Have a good soccer-summer if that makes you better. Or maybe it´s the non-soccer-summer that is even better. I hate that word. Soccer, what is that anyway?

SusuPetal said...

Soccer sucks.
Football rules!

Trotter said...

Hi ! Sorry for the absence, but after a long weekend break, I was working abroad last week...

Did it work? It's still hurting my back...
Now, did you see the Seven Zero to North Korea? That kills any depression... ;))

SusuPetal said...

Gil, my back is getting better day by day.
No, I didn't see that game, but I did hear the result. Good for you!

Anne Marie said...

Glad the surgery worked for the back; wish it could have done the same for your depression. Sorry to hear it wasn't a win/win that day.

A hug.

Tell the lupines that I adore them.

SusuPetal said...

Anna Marie, thank you, I'll tell the lupines your message.